I think I have pretty much made up my mind about not being an atheist. I know that I believe in God now (and I am sure He must have gone “yey!!!” when I wrote this).
I am still undecided about what kind of God I believe in.
I know He exists because he has given all my share of chips to other people and all their share of salads to me.
I know He is there because I am genuinely surprised at the power that helps me walk to the station and get on the train and get off and walk home after an hour and a half at the university gym.
Had it not been for Him, I would not have found my way back home when I get lost about five times a week trying to use a seemingly “smart” combination of public transport.
I think we should all have our own personalized Gods.
Religion turns God into a really boring entity. I feel that God must not so verbose and fastidious. The more words go into defining him, the lesser He stays in them.
I think He is just the instinct inside us that lets us do beautiful things. That lets us appreciate the fact that we are here.
It is funny sometimes to realize that between two events that we have no control over, our birth and death, how finicky and fussy we get trying to control everything that lies between them. The kind of education we want, the kind of money we want to make, the kind of woman or women we want to be with, the kind of food we want to consume, what we wish to leave behind and what we do not want to let others have!
When I think of it with an airplane view towards things around me, I think that God also must have an outrageous sense of humour. I can imagine Him rolling on the floor with laughter when he sees us getting raging mad at things that make no difference whatsoever in the larger scheme of things.
The Bhagwat Geeta defines four kinds of followers of God. The one who is suffering, the one who wants, the one who seeks and the one who knows. It amazes me how well grouped that is.
I still remember how we used to go to the Temple right next to my best friend Pooja's house only before a written test (when we were suffering) and the semester results (when we lit the incense sticks with greedy and helpless minds). I think most of us shuttle back and forth between the first two groups.
I have known about the glimpse of the “Seekers” in some of the books I have read about Buddhist and Zen philosophies. I really think that the real Eastern culture is about knowing yourself to know God. God is not a group activity in the East like the Sunday mass. We can approach our own God in our own way and I think the Eastern culture has ample routes to reach Him.
The East, in her devotion goes to a point where the worshiper and God become one and the same. I am in awe of this merging of the observer and the object. It teaches you a lot more than what it says. When your devotion is so flexible and fluid, it works in everything you do. When you become what you believe in, you end up leaving yourself in everything you do and still having all that you are within yourself. Like water, your devotion fills everything that it is applied to. It does not ask questions about God’s identity, nor does it turn Him into one of those hot theological discussions over a few pitchers on a Friday night. It just keeps you alert, aware and happy about the little things that seem to work for you and around you to take you through this refreshingly mysterious labyrinth called Life.