Doctor of Patience - When you write unidirectional emails and wait outside your supervisor's office to get your report read.
Doctor of Procrastination - When you keep counting "Days Left For the Presentation" and feeling good when you multiply the figure by 24. :)
Doctor of Paranoia - When you imagine yourself being deported to India because the examination committee found a typo in your report!
Doctor of Paraphrasing - When you condense a 8000 word report to 4000 words and it still means everything that it meant before.
Doctor of Persuasion - When you persuade yourself to go on with your research by giving reasons like "This is going to be the next big thing the world will witness"( Hahahaha! Dream on!!!)
Doctor of Pandemonium- When you have to look into your shoe rack for the article on dissociation chemistry of ionic solvents in front of your supervisor.
Doctor of Presentation - When you think that you can distract the jury from your erroneous experiments by wearing Chanel no.5.
Doctor of Pedagogy - When you find yourself giving flawless advice to fresh PhD students about things that you yourself had to resubmit three times.
Doctor of Poverty - When everything including your haircut and pre-paid recharge is scheduled in concert with your next pay-day.
Doctor of Philanthropy - When you vacate seats in trains and help old men cross roads in a hope that God adds this credit Karma to the completion of your thesis.
....And Doctor of Philosophy - When you actually start believing in consoling quotes like "Failure is the first step towards success" because you would go insane if you don't! :)
